How to NOT EAT - totally non-expert advice on weight loss
Fri, 10 June, 2016
Weight loss? I’ve lost so much weight in my time that I should theoretically be air, or even a little black hole of negative volume. Yes, of course, it piles back on - we’ve all been there. But although I’ve recently yo-yoed in the wrong direction, I’m proud to say that it is in my capabilities to become seriously slim. Just not doing it right now. Err - what cake?
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I know we are all different and what works for one won’t work for others. A friend of mine lost an admirable amount of weight on a diet of baked potatoes. Me? I’d BECOME one if I tried that. Carbs are poison for me, even in the sweetest form.
For what it’s worth, a bunch of advice based on what I did to lose weight. Brekkie: have an egg in the morning, here’s my tip for perfect scrammie.
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Or have 100g of full fat cream cheese, or a whole apple, cored and cut in quarters - that way it will make you think you’re eating proper food. And if you’re really hardcore - have a filleted grapefruit (or orange if you must), here's how to do it.
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None of those options may sound terribly appealing, but they will keep you going reasonably long and make you feel good about yourself.
Lunch? What lunch? Just kidding - again, try no carbs. I ate sliced radishes or sliced cucumber, salted and peppered and topped with a generous dollop of mayo. But a salad like this, raw asparagus, will be adequate too. And if you’re very hungry, have a poke or one of those raw salmon and tuna things from salad bars - no rice though!
Dinner - salmon is deceitfully calorific so go for chicken, smashed into saltimbocca or creamed with leeks. Duck is all right. Beef steak is all right.
![](../RecipeImages/Blue%20cheese%20steak/blue-cheese-steak-blog.jpg)
No rice. No potatoes. No pasta. No noodles. And needless to say nil solid post-dins, wine is allowed, otherwise depression would threaten.
At the weekends let your hair down a bit with a piece of cake instead of breakfast (it’s important to eat carbs and sweets early in the day so you burn them off) and perhaps have a spoonful of pasta or rice with dinner, especially when eating out. It might be a myth from an obsolete diet plan but it works for me: if pasta or rice I must, have it veggie.
![](../RecipeImages/Pappardelle%20with%20fresh%20tomatoes/pasta-with-fresh-tomatoes-blog.jpg)